give me a reason.

why are you doing this? its already difficult enough.
even if you don't need me anymore. i still need you. just when i told myself that i won't cry for you anymore. but here i am. with tears flowing down my face. are you trying to throw our friendship away? are you? you may not need me anymore. but i still need you. need you to be my strength. i cannot go through all these alone.
it wasn't easy to accept not having you constantly by my side. i've just managed to go on with you only as my friend. but now you're throwing this away? what for? what fucking for?
who can i go to now? if you're not here.
don't give me a lame excuse that it's not right. its not for you to decide for me. i chose this path. of being your friend. i've let go. i've moved on. but i'm not willing to throw this friendship away. if you care for me. then let me be there. please. i still need someone to turn to. can it be you?
my head feels so heavy. and i'm sinking. just when i thought that GOD was going to make my life better. the devil comes along and pulls me into the black hole. you were there to save me back then. will you be here to save me now? you brought me light. so continue to keep me from the darkness thats threatening to eat me alive.
you tell me to turn to someone else. but its different. don't you see? they can't constantly be there for me like you can. they don't know me like you do. they're not as accepting as you are. so please. don't push me aside and leave me alone. i'm getting weaker. and i hope you see this. i can't hndle this right now alright? maybe when i'm stronger. cause i know that when i'm stronger. i'm string enough to handle this. to handle all of this without te risk of breaking into pieces.


just not now.